Indebtedness: Asset or Liability?

It seems very apropos that my blog for Valentine’s is on indebtedness. On the day that we celebrate love, family and friendships of many kinds, it is important to reflect on the nature of relationship itself.

Last week in my blog post on Mother’s Milk, I wrote how my daughter has taught me so much already in life and because of that, I felt hugely indebted to her in my heart. The phrase stuck in my mind all week. I was perplexed that I had used the word indebtedness to describe such an overwhelming expression of love.

Debt, for many people and myself included, has been something I have usually shied away from. I perceived debt as a shackle that would chain me down and so I avoided it at all costs. Yet life has a funny way of playing tricks on you. When I decided to launch my business I was faced with a common question- where would my capital come from? And into business debt I went, what felt like thrusting myself into the abyss of “Oh my God, now I owe someone something!”

It has been three years and I still owe a big part of that initial investment that came my way. The interesting thing however, is that by incurring debt my relationship to it changed. I have come to see it now as sacred weight. Owing something to someone else “woke” me up in a certain way (as opposed to simply growing up). I was now in relationship with someone and something. I became personally invested in my project, and as a result it brought me closer to the material ground.

As Lynn Twist shared in a recent talk, debt is a key element of the Achuar people in the Ecuadorian Amazon. Debt even replaces money at times. It becomes an essential component of their exchange economy- by giving something to someone else (either in trade, labor or in kind); there is an knowing that you will receive a similar help back. This is what keeps their “currency” alive and local (i.e. they owe goods and services to each other within the tribe), and this is what keeps the community members in check with each other. Wiping out debt means wiping out relationships. The expectation of giving and receiving becomes a common way of life. We become continually indebted to each other and interdependent. This sacred weight becomes an important bond.

So, why is this important today? Because it can serve as a reminder to ask ourselves: How well do I give and receive? Debt is a two way street, and it requires not just money. How well do I give of myself? (my time, my attention, my love). How well do I receive “pay” from others? (their help, their guidance, their love). This is the juice that makes our economy go round and round- we are in relationship with each other, all the time. When we fully embrace this and step into this dance more fully, we can begin to experience debt and payback not only as assets and liabilities, but as the ebb and flow of real relationships, that keep us human, that keep us awake, walking with our eyes wide open, that keep our feet on the ground.

Ps- It’s important to note that this cycle requires us to fully participate, to not shy away from current debt/exchange agreements regardless of how overwhelming they might feel. I invite you to look at your debts this week and see how you can re-enliven their flow, maybe just by giving a little bit back to them as a gesture of gratitude for the gifts that debt has brought into your life.

And pps- The inclusion of “interest” on debt is a discussion that requires further discussion. Some would argue this is what thrust us into a predominately-growth economy that disrupts the natural gestation and unfolding of our projects requiring that they produce more than they are meant to, prematurely. (How can you ask a baby to run in its first year of life?) But anyway….for another time….! J

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